В собраниях сочинений разных известных людей регулярно попадаются письма, которыми они обменивались с современниками. Даже отдаленно не претендуя ни на какое величие, а чисто забавы ради, публикую здесь немного своей переписки на английском языке.
Hey Steve! Time for my English practice. It was great to got some message from you. Today I felt myself a bit as celebrity. One of Russian musical magazines sent the one question to many people who ever meet world known rock stars. So I got question about you. And I had to talk about you again. Sometime I feel it terrible because I have very interesting life, but people always ask me about you only. Sure you have the same with magazines asking the same questions every time for the decades. A lot of Russian players think that I practice some secret exercises from Steve Vai. The humour that I have a good practice of English only. Not a guitar. Writing to Steve is the only possibility to write English something not of the job issues like orders, shipments, costs, marketing etc. Vai is only the one reader of my non-business English at whole world.
Question from magazine:
We were looking for the bass player who can play the jam with Steve at the Moscow clinic. And we choosed one of the best in Russia. There is nothing special that such great bassist works in the band of the main pop star in Russia named Leps. The tickets for the show of that pop star were incredible expensive. I did not like this kind of pop music and never think about visiting the show.
But one day later this bass player calls me and offer two tickets for the most expensive seats at the venue. He did it as the thanks for giving him the possibility to play with Steve. I had no ideas what to do with this tickets. It was the beautiful time between my first and second marriage. I left first wife and didn't meet the next victim of family life. But I knew that my freedom will not be forever. There was a very pretty girl in our office, who was cold as ice with me. But she loved that pop star and my tickets were only chance for her to visit this expensive show.
And we did it. We drank a lot of expensive cognac during show and had great sex at my home after show. Yes, I did it and my dream came true. Thanks to Steve Vai. He gave me sex. And thanks for not with him. Sure it was the greatest thing that I got after meeting Steve Vai. More than expected. And it helped me a lot as a musician. Because every great sex gives you a lot of inspiration.
Please understand that my current wife is not that girl. I could not have wife with such terrible music taste. It could be ok for sex, but not for life in a family. My current wife loves Led Zeppelin. But Vai can not help me with tickets for Led Zeppelin show. Nobody can. It's a great title for the blues song called "Nobody can help me with Stairway To Heaven" (So I have to look for the Stairway To the Toilet in our local bar).
2019. Steve: Thank you for the story. It made me laugh laugh very hard and out loud in hotel room in Japan. And when I was reading it, I was hearing your voice and this make me laugh more. Now you see how Steve Vai and cognac can win Sex with women with bad taste in music. Cheers for now.